I’ve binned my 2018 New Year’s resolutions. Unopened. They were past their use-by date. Somehow, they ended up being kicked under the bed or falling behind bookcases, where dust grows in tumbleweed form, buried under dictionaries on my desk, or accidentally stepped on and crushed.
No matter. They’ve served their purpose. They’ve made me aware of my true intentions. Of where my focus truly lay and of where it was lacking.
As I threw them all into the recycling bin, I wondered if I should form new resolutions for 2019. Where would I put them, so they wouldn’t get lost again? On top of the tower of books I hope to read, ever-growing and neglected in favour of all the books I feel I have to read for my work? This novel won a prize. I’d better read it in case I can pitch a translation proposal to a publisher. Next to the address book with the contact details of all the friends I’ve lost touch with? I must call or write to them. I haven’t seen them for ages. But first I must finish this translation. And then I have this other book deadline. I haven’t got time to see them right now, anyway. I can only take one day off this month and I have to go and see my mother. That reminds me, I promised to buy her those Italian biscuits. Or in my writing folder? I must definitely write tomorrow. Or possibly over the weekend. My own stuff. I’m too tired now. I can’t think straight. It’s past 9 o’clock and I’ve been translating since early morning. But I really must write. I know I’ve been saying this for months. Oh, and I must remember to buy some more potatoes. And do we have any yoghurt left? I’d better check the fridge… When did I start writing this book…? Oh, I had no idea it’s been this long. How about sticking a list of resolutions to the mirror? When did I last look at myself in the mirror? I mean really look at myself? I look so haggard, so tired, so grey. Or perhaps I can add it to my list of travel plans? Yes, I’d love to go there but not this weekend. This weekend I really need to work. I’m so behind already. Besides, can I afford to spend the money? What if publishers don’t offer me another translation project after this?
I once saw a cartoon on Twitter. A woman approaching an aged writer sitting at a café table. “I’m a huge fan of your intentions,” she says, shaking hands with him. I’ve printed it and stuck it on my wall, where I can see it.
For 2019, no New Year’s resolutions. No more living in the future. As Mame sings in Jerry Hermann’s fabulous musical, “It’s Today!” The time is now.
No more planning. But doing.
Take a deep breath. Focus on my intention. Direct it… Now.
I wish all my readers a happy, healthy, prosperous, creative and fulfilling 2019!
Scribe Doll
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The only resolution I make any more is to read more books. Happy New Year, Katia!
That’s a fine resolution, indeed! I’ve recently allowed myself to read a book I actually wanted to read, ‘Circe’ by Madeline Miller. It was pure joy, pleasure, like a nectar of the gods.
So true! Here’s to today!
Yay!
I like your intentions, Katia! They do sound so much like mine. In fact, cleaning the refrigerator was on my list since before January 1st. Well, it took until yesterday, but I finally got to it. Now, the writing…hmmm…. Best to you and yours for a fulfilling 2019!
Well done! I sometimes think some of uus old Red Roomers should set up a writers’ support group, to encourage one another to write!
Hi, Katia, and (dare I say it?) “Happy New Year!” I loved your story about the cartoon writer with the “good intentions.” My own problems are much the same, just not enough time, and I was feeling yucky a few weeks ago because I’d been slacking off on my sleep time in order to work. Now I’m back in good shape sleepwise, but my work is going very slowly, and I can’t think when I last read any fiction–I think it was a short story. I’ve been busy crafting things to sell, and soon I need to read a manuscript for a (possibly paying) friend. Not much money in any of it, but some is better than none. Anyway, I think Liz above is right, and you should make the resolve for the New Year not to resolve anything, much! Have as good a time as you can, and try to find some time amid all your worries for yourself. Easier said than done, right? I hope you and H. and your mom are well. Have a good one!
“Not much money in any of it, but some is better than none” – oh, how I understand and sympathise! A very happy New Year to you, too. May it bring you many unexpected gifts!
🙂 … I’m relieved I’m not alone with having gone off those resolution pledges. For me, day to day intentions are the most effective ones, in that they attract the energy to overcome procrastination,
Best things in 2019 for you and yours. ☼
When I first started doing QiGong, eager -beaver that I am – I asked my teacher how long I should practise every day. “5 minutes,” he replied. “No, but seriously?” I protested. “Just 5 minutes a day,” he insisted. “And then if you feel like it, do another 5 minutes, but only if you feel like it.” This is how I do 45-60 minutes every day. You’re right about the little-by-little philosophy – you achieve much more this way.
I’ve been so busy over the last few weeks I haven’t even thought of New Year resolutions and I feel very light of heart ! Let’s see what the year brings and what I do with it!
Happy 2019 to you and H. – may you get to read all the books you want! X
And I hope you’re not so busy you can’t relax and enjoy time to yourself. Happy New Year to you, too!
Good luck with your intentions and plenty of courage to make them reality. May the force be with you! 😉
So be it. Thank you. And may the gods of music always stand by your side.
It’s the only way to live: in today, with a plan of real action for tomorrow. 💜
I’m learning that 🌺